Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed