new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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