i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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