I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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