Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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