So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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