Nicole vs. Life
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize