I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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