Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
as a side note pls kill me
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