it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
