Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
