She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
My dick has a subreddit
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
