We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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