Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face