so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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