jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
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