I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize
