yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
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