doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
