Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
