Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I deserve this hangover.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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