Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
