theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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