real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He keeps bees of course he's weird
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car