Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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