The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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