"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
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