Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
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