you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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