Already got asked if we're dating
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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