I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.