i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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