i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
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