College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
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