Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
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