i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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