That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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