So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
