Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
