my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
