Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.