You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize
