My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
