We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
