Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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