I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
