i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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