why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
they call him Oral-B. enough said
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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