you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
