i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
