chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
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